Have you ever been trying to do something for some time now, and nothing works?
You’ve tried everything. Using most of your energies to keep your cool each and every time you fail, just to keep going at it again til you succeed.
It’s not madness if you’re trying to better yourself while looking for different ways to overcome the obstacle. No matter what you do, the result is the same: Failure.
So, you take a break, focus on other things, then get back to it again: Failure.
Ask for help online, vent to your friends on the group chat: Failure.
Go for a run to clear your mind, exercise, cook, spend 12 hours away from it: Failure
Create a fake account on a discussion forum, just to rant and pour your frustrations anonymously: Failure
Sometimes I get close to the finish line, I can see it: “This time I will achieve it.” But then the majority of times I can’t even get past the first hurdle: “Damn, this was worse than the last ones.”
Am I just supposed to accept defeat and quit? Is it me that’s not good enough? Why can’t I just make it work?
I don’t quit. I’m sure of my talents and capabilities. I know I’m good at what I do, and even worse, I’m stubborn. Quitting is not an option if I’m set on getting it done.
Not being able to get through this is hurting inside, swallowing me whole. It’s affecting my personal and work life. I’m not interested in doing my chores nor daily responsibilities. Food doesn’t taste the same. I have no motivation for anything else. It’s even in my subconscious while I dreaming. I’m dead-set on bringing this to an end.
Is it maybe one of those things that just takes time, and some day, one day, you’ll wake up and it’ll suddenly click without any effort whatsoever? Is it my destiny to keep mulling this over?
This right here is another fundamental part of the process: Expressing my thoughts and worries with the hope that it will help me improve and see the bigger picture.
I just know that I’ll get there, and soon. I trust my mind and the power within me.
And when that day comes,
I’ll finally be able to beat the final optional boss in Dark Souls 3.
The guy is RUTHLESS!
“You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.”-Maya Angelou