Chronicles of a severe procrastinator (pt. 1)

Let me start with the obvious.

Yes, it says pt.1 because there will be more. First step in any recovery is recognizing you have a problem. Bear with me, please.

I have to admit, I missed this feeling. Looking at the white screen of the processor (sorry, black. Because in this house we have everything in dark mode. Protect your eyes, my friends), and listen to the clickity-clack of the keyboard; creating sentences in front of your eyes as if it were a magic trick.

The process starts from the moment I wake up, well, no, from the moment I go to bed the night before —chicken or egg scenario (ok, stop)—. I open my eyes and the first thing that comes to mind: “Fuck, another day. Meteor didn’t hit today, nuclear bomb wasn’t launched. Fuck me”. 

Then I proceed to write emails from bed (remote working IS. THE. SHIT.), curse again, and finally get out of bed. Up until recently, I’d have to walk my dog, a 10-year old rottie-mix that passed away 2 months ago, RIP TO A REAL ONE, DANZO-CHMNKMN. Loved him with all my heart, and BTW, he’s the one from my homepage picture.

Before I officially start working, but after brushing my teeth:
“Coffee, yes. Right now.” Like a mindless but gourmet zombie.

Being one of those coffee snobs —apologies in advance to all my readers. Coffee is a serious business, not just caffeinated flavored water and cream— I have to make the first crucial decision of the day. Grinding the beans for what type of machine: Espresso, french press, mocha pot or drip. (I told you I take coffee seriously.) Nothing like that first sip of black coffee to wash away the minty toothpaste flavor in your mouth, and start the day off right.

Ok so…

Eyes open, the world didn’t end, send work emails—> curse.
No dog, no walk -> RIP Danzo
Teeth cleaned and first sip of coffee -> scrumptious

Immediately afterwards:

“I have to write today’s blog post early before my day gets complicated; because it most certainly will (spoiler alert, it doesn’t.)”

I proceed to sit at my desk in front of my work laptop, waste countless hours watching memes and bad takes on social media, turn on HBO to watch a series that I have already seen about 5 times (Wire or Sopranos are the go-tos if you were asking. Some Trailer Park Boys if I’m feeling serious about not getting anything done at all till the last moment), then I’ll MAYBE start working a couple of deadlines and of course, skip out on writing anything creative at all until late at night.

The upper paragraph is a normal day for me.

Evenings are a different monster. Yoga, running, cooking, studying, reading, writing, and of course, a discreet and healthy personal-social life (but I won’t bore with those details, yet.)

Just realized that this started (and was meant to be) as a “The writing process of a writer“. It ended as the perfect example on how to procrastinate and not finish what you set out to do initially.

Hey, it happens. We out here live, and will keep going.

#8 out of 365 Mo’fos. See you tomorrow.


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