Car rental companies are a total racket

As promised, two posts on the same day to make up for the scheduling mishap from yesterday.

Gonna give you a quick rundown of my first day in “Caribbean Paradise”.
Airport shuttle was late, ok. Happens.

Rental place wanted to charge me x3 the amount of the online reservation. At midnight, with no way of getting to the hotel, and with a 50% cancellation fee charge. I was being held hostage by these extortionists.

“You see, our online reservation is just a guidance price. We actually have to add service charges, taxes, mandatory insurance, fixed daily toll fee…”
– Yea, ok. None of that was on the website. I know ’cause I checked all the fine print. I want the rate I got in my reservation confirmation. (Shows screenshot).
“That’s impossible, sir. That price cannot be obtained.”
– But it’s here, on your website, with your logo and email address; what are you guys trying to pull?
“Look, I know it can be hard to understand. Here’s what I’ll do for you. Gimme your US driver’s license.”
– Ok, here you go. What’s changed?
“I’m giving you an Ohio resident discount”
– Perfect. (Yea, she’s definitely making stuff up)
“Do you have a credit card?”
– Of course, take your pick (shows wallet).
“Ooooh, an Amex. Why didn’t you say so? I’m adding another preferred discount exclusively for AMEX customers.”
-You don’t say…
“And on top of that, since you’ve been a very patient customer. I’m giving you a vehicle upgrade at no extra charge.”
– Oh wow, wait. A sports SUV?! Damn! How much is this gonna cost me now?
“Just a little bit over the original reservation quote we gave you. Now I know you are just going to say no, but I need to ask these questions for the record. You ready?”
– Let’s go.
– No
“Toll fee”
– No
“Roadside assistance”
“Perfect, now sign here, here, here and here.”
– Done!
“My assistant will have the car over immediately. You may wait outside.”
– Golly… This has been great. Thank you so much!

Hops into a brand new SUV and drives away from the rental place.

*5 seconds later*
A new text message arrives from AMEX: “A $1,000 amount has been placed on hold for this account.”

*5 minutes later*
I got over the most horrible and camouflaged pothole in the history of traffic and roads. The brand new chrome rim gets scratched.

Only two things are guaranteed in this life:
1- Death
2- Worst case scenarios happening every time they can.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: