Every time I remember or confirm it again, I will repeat the exact same words:
People who talk about other people are either leading boring lives (and/or hate what they do) or feel the genuine need to cause drama out of envy, jealousy, or good old-fashioned, wanting to screw with other people’s business.
Unless, of course, it’s a matter of speaking ill of others because they caused harm or because there is some kind of conflicting relationship for X or Y reason. That can be more or less can be justified, the rest is 100% guaranteed to fall into the first two options mentioned above.
If what you’re saying about another person doesn’t help, protect, contribute, inform or improve, you fall into the category of speaking to cause damage or spewing words just because you can; both unnecessary and with eventual future consequences.
I’ll be the first to admit it, in the past I took part in what I criticize today. Of course, I was immature, I was learning, I did not have total control or knowledge of how to behave in the face of interpersonal conflicts and conversations with third parties. There is a learning curve, this is known and noted.
This is not about children and teenagers. This is about adults and professionals who have the hobby of carrying and bringing other people’s conversations, talking about third parties not present at the moment, bragging about knowing the intentions and reasons of why someone else did any given thing.
My tolerance for this type of situation is practically zero. I don’t accept it, I can’t stand it. People who participate in this type of dynamic will be confronted, pushed away and/or added to categories of limited attachment.
Boundaries are healthy.
Toxic people need to be removed.