Felt a bit of optimism today, a bit of “everything will be alright”. Immediately slapped myself back to normal. I want full happiness for the right, known reasons, not a sudden feeling that takes over without any explanation.

Lots of people would prefer to ride it, and make it last. I’m not one of those. Give me a double shot of bitter reality anytime of day instead of a sugar coated false sense of wellness.

Don’t want to call it depression, yet. I mean, everyone living in America has some sort of mental/behavior condition nowadays. Let’s say it’s sensory overload of reality, and wanting to be able to finally disconnect from everything, but still caring enough for one to be affected by the constant shit happening around you, and state of the world which we are currently witnessing its collapse.

Escapism works, for a while at least, and those consequences linger for a long-ass time. Whereas you choose drugs, alcohol, new exercise routine, collecting Funko Pops or even playing video games, believe when I tell you: It won’t be enough, or better yet, it will only be enough if you start fucking up everything in your life.

Some days I think the guy that only thinks of throwing a football, picking up a cheerleader and owning a Charger is the one that’s truly happy. The woman that posts her tiktok videos dancing, wearing anime clothing, and getting thousands of likes and compliments.
The old man that worked all his life, retired and now goes fishing every other day.
The dog that gets walked 3 times a day, eats organic food, lounges inside the house all day getting spoiled, and doesn’t pay any bills.